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I'm a bit behind on the emails so forgive me! What you write is always of interest but this one really resonated. I'm 50, menopausal, I'm English and despite Ireland having been my home for over 30 years I don't always feel completely at home - and neither do I feel completely home in England it should be said- and coincidentally I'm researching Irish goddesses (including the Cailleach for my second novel). The information you provided, the thoughts, insight - wonderful. Here's to embracing womanhood and old age, to looking forward to our next chapters in life rather than mourning what has gone. I'm off to wash put the hair dye 😄

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Sounds like you and I have a lot in common! England ceased being my home a long time ago. Its uncomfortable feeling like you don't quite fit anywhere. But here's to embracing womanhood and old age! I just spent several days living in a forest with a community of women of all ages, wove a basket, ate foraged wild foods, sat around campfires till late into the night, and came back with a bunch of wonderful memories, a new sense of conviction, and a skin covered in mozzie bites! 🤣 It was all very emotional. But it made me realise we can do this aging thing... there was no judgement, no make up, no hairstyling, no competition, just acceptance. We were barefoot and vulnerable, It was so freeing and empowering. You know that phrase which gets bandied around so much, "You are enough"? I realised I actually am. And so are you. Ditch the dye if it pleases you. But do it for you. Glad you are enjoying H A G, that makes me happy, thank you.🙏 And best of luck with your novels! 🍀🍀🍀

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Sounds like you had an amazing experience! What I have found as regards aging is that it is very much determined on how we perceive it. My debut book deals with - in part - perception and the many roles women take on and/or are forced to take on, and in doing so, how we often 'lose' who we are. My WIP has been one I have been thinking about since a chance encounter with Olivia Robertson of the Temple of Isis. I was at Clonegal and she asked me if I was 'here for the ceremony'. I replied no and a little while later I saw her disappear into the woods with a group of people in Egyptian robes. I have been kicking myself ever since for not joining them - I wonder what my WIP would be like if I had? But anyway, a seed was sown and I started thinking about old ways and traditions, and what we, as a culture, have lost by putting nature second. My idea for my book evolved. I started to think about the triune of 'maiden, mother, crone', and also once again of perception. I won't bore you with the details (I'm still in the word vomit first draught stage!), but it is and has been, an informative and inspiring, and has made me very introspective. For example, as a young child I adored an elderly neighbour, Aunty Lily. She was a former Montessori teacher with long grey hair that she wore tied with a ribbon, and she liked to stop and quote poetry to me (in particular Trees by Joyce Kilmer), moving her hands balletically as she did so. I thought she was amazing and vowed that my hair would be like hers when I was old and that I would be as in love with life as she was. Fast forward and I dye my hair because according to society I'm too young to be grey, it's not attractive. And now I'm thinking, says who? Why am I hiding? What's wrong with being older? Yes, I'm not as fit as I was, I have wrinkles, bits of me are heading south, but it's inevitable. It's life. And as for the triune of maiden, mother, crone? Well, I've come to realise that they aren't separate entities, not to me anyway. I may be at the crone stage, but that doesn't mean i can't at times embrace my maiden qualities or that because I am a crone I am no longer a mother - I still have children, albeit grown up ones, I have a grandchild - nurturing and motherhood are still very much part of me. So aging - bring it on: I shall age disgracefully and embrace everything that I am.

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:)

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Ali, thought you might be interested in this article. https://mythopedia.com/topics/danu

the only thing I'm not sure about it is... they compared danu to anu. It could be. but 'a' in Greek stands for without. so danu could be without anu?? BTW, dunno. if you sent me anything never got it. guessing I left you speechless.

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Haha! Well, you did send me a lot to read, but I'll get back to you soon, I promise!

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I really love that you include these little quick videos in your articles. They help emphasize those points. I love that you clearly do a huge amount of research to organize your articles in a meaningful and authentic way.

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Hi Ali, I used to be able to write you an email, (we've swapped a few) but i don't see my emails going through. How can I reach you? Merry (moisele)

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Hi Merry, how are you? You should be able to reply to this email at the top, to the right of where your email address is. Or you can just write a reply in the comments here, whatever works best for you. 😊

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hi Ali, Thank you for the comment. I'm ok and hope you are doing well. Can you confirm receipt of emails? Thanks, Merry

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Hi Merry, your email went into my spam for some reason. Thank you for getting in touch, will read and reply this evening.

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Thank you, Ali!

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Hi Deirdre... yes, I will be 56 next month, how the time flies, right? I guess from your comment that you and I are going through much the same experiences right now. I'm so glad this post resonated with you, and even more glad to make a connection and know that I am not going through this alone. Thank you gor your comment. 💕

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This is amazing. We must be the same age? I’m 56 now. I read the first section with interest but then the second section - full of honesty and personal details. Fantastic. Every single word resonated with me. I was almost shouting as I read this. Thank you. Loved this. Inspiring and rooted in the wisdom of thousands of years of women gone before us. 💚💚💚

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I love the catalogue of Hag and Cailleach stories you have woven into this and then moving on to personal experiences and opinion to maybe apply your interpretation of these stories. For me it’s tempting to have a conversation about one after the other, but that would be ridiculous in a comment section. Overall, I just love the passion and vision put into this plus enabling us viewers to easily read, absorb, and take in.

The ‘disposable’ woman has been quite a leading conversation with me on social media these past few days, especially for those passed child bearning age and maybe with an empty nest. When we had the Labyrinth Gardens using the Labyrinths, especially Tree Labyrinth was focused on this. I suppose a man facilitating this was weird, but I received many women’s groups as I loathe talented women going to ‘waste’.

You talk of getting away from the linear thinking concepts of beginnings and ends and into visions of orbitals. I love all that because I believe, thinking of the foundations of Christianity, most people seem to get stuck at the Crucifixion. Certainly men seem to. I suppose there is more potential control there. But few people seem to move on to the Resurrection bit that, to me, moves everything into timelessness and continuity.

One thought, as I was reading your amazing work here, is how matured women who have been through their mother life, are able to teach and guide their daughters through birth and be there as a recharge boost through their daughter’s motherhood. Former mothers become teachers of mothers. Likewise, mothers teach their daughters how to become women as people, not objects. Lets move on from that dividing and wasteful culture.

I love how you also recommend women to be pride of their maturity, and be as distinguished in their grey. Among celebrities its amzing how many women became more beautiful as they became older. The late Diana Rigg certainly was one, Jane Seymour, Jennifer Saunders, and Judi Dench the queen of them all.

Yes, this is a very ‘wow!’ article. Way beyond giving it wolf whistles.

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Thank you John for your thoughtful response. I remember you discussing your women's groups on your Substack, and how they were searching for the goddess, and I don't think it at all weird. You have wisdom and you are a facilitator. I think in the 70s there was a school of thought in which men performed the role of consort to women in matriarchal societies. I dont believe matriarchal societies woild necessarily be any better than patriarchal ones, there is alwsys going to be power struggles in such one-sided society, but I like the idea of men and women supporting each other according to their strengths. Why is it so hard for humans to live in equality and respect, not just among our own kind, but with all other living beings and the land. I dont neccessarily look to female celebrities as examples of inspiring female aging, to be honest, because they have a privileged lifestyle which smooths the way. I think of my mother, who was strikingly beautiful and still is, who was abused by the men in her life and brought up 3 children single-handedly, and my grandmother, who was film-star gorgeous and also abused by men, but lived into her 90s, and my friend Jenni, who has 'reinvented' herself in recent years in ways I could not have imagined when we met years ago with our babies in our arms, these 'real" women are my greatest inspiration! And my little daughter Carys who lives a different life, though not by choice, and has taught me so much about what is important in life. GRÁ to you John! 😊

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Lovely response there Ali, especially your family references. Caused me to think why I have not recalled the women of my family much. My mother passed away when I was 4 so not much for me to go on there. But her mother, my grandmother, was a constantly joyful woman who seem to always be happy. I remember days out with her, just the two of us, and she was just total fun. Their marriage was hugely successful. I remember that neither of them got into each other’s way and when they came to do something together it was to the full as they loved each other’s company when it happened. I hope I learned a lot from that. Incredible start as they were catholics and my grandmother got pregnant at 21 years old and my grandfather was 17 years old … so they ‘had to get married’ … but it worked so well. The only turmoil was they tried to stop my mother marrying my father as they did not like all of the wizard and witchery stuff of my father’s family.

With women I’ve partnered with, I’ve always tended to relate to women with vision and acting on that in community rather than selfish ways. I’ve had no interest in having a house keeper or nurse as I’ve got use to doing that stuff since I was a child. Maybe that’s a nod for needs in male education? Mind you, it is nice to have a bedmaker, sometimes, as I’m still hopeless at that, but the laundry side of that it just fine with me.

I do get upset when potential of women is suppressed and they just shut down their ‘voice’ in the line of ‘duty’. I just think that is an awful waste. Of course there is a shut down during children upbringing as that is ‘duty’, but creative fun duty and potentially wonderful life experience. My wife and I were in quite a successful music and drama band but once the babies started arriving we both shut that down and engaged in the new mainly fun packed life. Remembering a time my wife’s parents picked up the children to take them away from us for a week. We looked at each other, “who are you?”. But we picked up some instruments revived a few songs we did, and performed at the local pub. The children returned and our instruments were packed away as the outdoors activities were more their thing than music and poetry and stuff. Still is.

Yes, thank you for your words encouraging me to translate them through family life and the quests for balance there.

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Your grandmother sounds like a wonderful woman! And it sounds to me like you learned so much from both sides of your family and kept their traditions alive. It's such a shame that when children come along we often shut down that creative side of ourselves, but needs must. Its so precious and such a joy and fulfillment to resume it in later life, though, isn't it?

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Yes, I am grateful of what has rubbed off on me. I have a situation this Easter that may demonstrate that. I am not going into background details, but Claire has her son, daughter in law and twin girls, under 3, living with them and they are all exhausted by the twins. But Claire has a large garden and I did chart up the twins. One thing I have experienced is a lot of women with sun in Taurus are incredible gardeners. I have an intense lifelong envy of them as it seems the moment they walk into a garden the whole garden immediately comes to attention and instantly blooms and have abundant crops ready to pick. Another trait of Taurus is laziness, so they get all of this abundance with little effort.

So I am going there this Easter, not with Easter eggs, but with kiddies gardening tools, aprons and tiny watering cans, plant containers and compost, bright flower plants and seeds ... and see if they can have fun messing with those :-). This worked with my own twins and grand twins. Get them involved in the activities you are doing but give them their space to try out their own versions Like with laundry give them a bowl of suds and a couple of safe dirty things, or when baking have their own wee baking bowl to mix together something and put that in the oven too.

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First, a huge ‘Wow!’ With this one Ali. First thought was how did you get all that into one Substack post? That’s like five or six Substacks there. I will be going back to read this a few times.

Timely for myself and probably other as I was taken back by the early news that Sanna had lost the vote for leadership in Finland, too quickly after Nicola handed her’s in for Scotland, and Lucinda in New Zealand. For some reason I cannot count in Liz Truss into this. With Sanna, Nicola, and Lucinda to seemed to be all about serving the people, and the economics will sort itself out. New Zealand even got more rights for it’s river’s too. Three women very much at service to their countries replaced by men that seem to be more into spreadsheets and balances than also supporting a council of empathy too. Government seems to need both to function.

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Yes, I'm disappointed we have lost these women leaders too. I hope there will be more like them coming up through the ranks in the future. I'm sure they will have inspired many young women. We just have to make sure history does not lose their names and stories, as usually happens where women are concerned. Only England has dissappointed with its female leaders; Maggie was strong but so destructive, snd Theresa May weak, and Liz Truss just ridiculous.

Btw your Substack on willows really touched and inspired me. I've signed up for a spinning workshop, and the leader has said she can also teach me weaving. I have found out there is a man in Cootehill who does willow weaving, so I am going to get in touch with him next. 💕

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I am biased, but for all things Willow very small to very large, I think Kate Burrows is a goddess and genius with this. I think you may spot photos of her work in my Substacks. Very warm person and a natural teacher, and very fair pricing. She may well do workshops your way, or you may simply set one up with a few local people. Worth contacting her to get a conversation going … Advanced workshops also include building your own Willow Coffin too :-) https://www.westcountrywillows.com/

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Hi John, thanks for the link and reccommendation, I had already spotted some workshops by her, but I would love to actually experience her eco lodge, so I will definitely get in touch! I love the idea of being able to put some of my invading willow to good use, but I guess that also means learning how to coppice!💕

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First, the good thing is coppicing of willow is that it’s almost a ‘no brainer’. After you start cutting away your willow branches you learn more each year about the effects of your cutting and how to get better rods to grow the following year.

As for Kate and Alan’s Round house, quite some amazing history there. They built a round house home in the woods in Devon. They had bought the woods but no planning permission so it was quite a fight to keep their home that spread through most media, and had great publicity on their willow and charcoal work. When they lost the fight for their home they set it on fire, but easily sold the land and used the money to buy land and property in Mayo. Luckily, Kate had a couple of sons established in Ireland. One is an incredibly successful wood sculpture carver. Kate and Alan wanted to revive their Devon roundhouse, but this time have it as the basket making and workshop HQ. So Alan and sons and friends built another. The skeleton is local spruce, due to lowest costs, but I think the weaving is a mix of hazel and willow. Their land they did use for market gardening but now i think it is all growing willow as Kate cannot find enough willow for all of her needs, especially as they are now into coffin making and other large willow jobs..

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Wow that is an amazing story! And who could imagine that willow weaving would be so in demand in this day and age? It's great to hear. 💕

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They partially increased demand. When people see what they do its always ‘can you do one for me too?’ An example is their willow coffins. Once they made a demo, they must have received about 100 orders within a day. That happened when Kate wove bird feeders a couple of winters ago. She was flooded with bird feeder orders. I got some, but what happened was the following spring, after feeding from them through winter, the birds broke them up to use as nesting material :-)

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